We went to the 20 week scan excited to find out the sex of the baby. We had already been blessed with a happy healthy little boy and the thought never crossed our mind that something may be wrong this time around. It just felt like a matter of course, something we needed to do to confirm everything would be ok.
Our scan was on a Friday and we were due to go on holiday on the Sunday, so my head was filled with what I needed to get done at work before I wrapped up for the day once we got back from the scan. My husband and I sat in the medical practice waiting room, both fiddling with our phones and replying to emails not really thinking about what we were waiting for. They called my name and we made our way to the ultrasound room, the other half distracted by his phone and me desperately needing a wee because they ask for you to have a full bladder when they scan you.
I got on the bed, lifted my top and waited for the sonographer to put the gel on my stomach whilst I chatted away to her. Once the gel was on she picked up the ultrasound wand and gently pressed it against my stomach saying ‘tell me if it’s too much pressure’. She moved the wand around and started to press harder saying ‘I’m struggling to get a clear picture, let see if we can get the baby to move’. This continued for about 20 minutes and I felt increasing pressure as she frantically tried to see something apologising that this probably wasn’t helping my full bladder, finally saying ‘why don’t you go relieve yourself, we’ll see if the baby moves and then we may get a better look’.
On return the frantic scanning continued for a further 10 minutes. The entire time I just thought the baby was being difficult and wasn’t in the right position to be scanned. She then said ‘why don’t you go for a walk and see if the baby will move, I’ll also give the hospital a ring and see if they can book you for a consultant appointment as we haven’t had a successful scan’. My husband and I left the room a little puzzled by the experience, wondering why she was being a bit strange. He went to update the parking and I wandered around the waiting room, shaking my tummy hoping to get the baby to move so we could get the scan over with. After a short while she came back and sat down in the waiting room, the other half was still sorting out the parking, probably distracted by a work call I thought as I sat next to her.
‘So I can’t get you seen by a consultant today, it’s going to have to be when you get back from holiday’. I hadn’t realised she was trying to get us booked in to be seen today. ‘It’s nothing to worry about though, this is just routine?’ I asked. She looked at me, her eyes sad whilst I waited for her to say yes, not to worry, its all routine, this happens all the time, but she didn’t. She just said ‘I think its best you wait to see the consultant’. In that moment I knew it wasn’t good news, but I pretended to myself the entire time we were on holiday that I didn’t notice the sadness in her eyes and the apology in her voice that what she had spotted wasn’t going to be good news. As she got up I feebly asked ‘are you going to try scan me again’ hoping she was going to see something different that would change her demeanour. ‘No, I think it’s best if we let the consultants take a look’ she said and walked away.
Project Aiya 